Several years ago I found myself telling God about all the life circumstances I was worried about at the time.  There were many unknowns and I didn’t have answers to my questions. Back then, I was poster child material for the ‘Type A’ personality and ‘Type A’s’ don’t like not knowing what’s going to happen the next day, week, month, year, etc.

When I finished conveying my list of worries, God simply told me He was taking out the trash.  I was like “that’s nice God, but trash day isn’t until the end of the week, and none of my worries involve trash or waste disposal so what about my real problems?!”.  He then gave me the explanation…

It’s Thursday.  Trash day is tomorrow. Our trash needs to make it to the curb by the time the garbage truck makes its way to our house. Hubby tells me first thing in the morning not to worry about the trash because he’s going to make sure it gets to the curb.

If I see my husband as consistent, reliable, and trustworthy, then I won’t think twice about the trash.  He said he’ll take it out and I have every reason to believe him. However, if I see my husband as the opposite, I’ll walk by the trash all day wondering if he’s going to take care of it…thinking “maybe I should just go ahead and do it to make sure it gets done – that way I won’t have to waste precious mental energy and time keeping track of whether it’s done or not.”

What if it gets to be late Thursday night after hubby has gone to bed and I see the trash still sitting in the kitchen?  If I trust him, I know he probably plans to put it out before leaving for work. If I don’t trust him, I end up taking out the trash myself while huffing and puffing because he didn’t do what he said he would (even though technically I didn’t give him the opportunity to follow through).

God is taking out the trash. What that means to me is directly proportionate to  WHO He is to me. Do I have the proper perspective?

“Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” – Hebrews 13:5

“God said to Moses, ‘I am who I am.’ This is what you are to say to the Israelites: ‘I am has sent me to you.’ ” – Exodus 3:14 ….HE IS anything we need.

“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.”   – Hebrews 13:8….He has proven himself to be faithful time and time again.

If you find yourself  ‘staring at the bag of trash in the kitchen’, spend time researching who God is.  It’s easy to trust Him when we remember He’s the same God who created the universe!

Image Credit: Erin Kass Photography

I read something yesterday that made me go ‘wow, that’s really good.’ A bit later it came to mind again and I realized that it really wasn’t the first time I had ever heard something along those lines. In fact I had probably heard the same concept several times before yet when I read the sentence yesterday it still resonated with me as if it were the first time I had ever heard it.

It was a reminder that we each have a unique story to tell. Some of our stories may sound alike. Some of our revelations from God may be the same thing about the same verse. But there’s still value in each one of our ‘translations’. I mean, look at all the translations of the Bible…the content is generally the same yet each version gives you a different way to consider it!

We so easily get lost in the trap of comparison and feel as though we have nothing new to bring to the table. But absolutely no two people, even identical twins are alike. Every single one of the gazillion (that’s a real number right?!) people who have ever walked the face of this earth has been one-of-a-kind. No duplicates. And we’re ALL made in the image of Christ (let THAT one sink in for a minute if you want your mind blown about the greatness and HUGEness of God!)

You are valuable. You are capable of bringing worth to the world. If you have been told otherwise, it’s a nasty lie from the enemy. Because you were created as a masterpiece by the most talented artist anyone has ever known. So what if someone else seems to have the same _____ as you. They don’t have your experiences and insight that mix with that ____ to make it uniquely yours.

Put on the blinders that block out the comparisons and go boldly after the YOU that God created to rock this life and leave a legacy for future generations.

Image Credit: Erin Kass Photography

I tend to avoid talking too much about this because it can be a source of fear and that’s totally not the point and what God intends…

But when we step up and out in faith and press into God to grow our relationship with Him, as the saying goes ‘New Level, New Devil’. There is a legitimate spirit realm. So often we get so caught up on the concrete and our circumstances but as the 2 Corinthians 4:18 says “So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”

When we stand up and say  ‘I want to be a leader. I want to do more for God’, essentially we’re saying ‘I want to put a larger target on myself for the enemy’  Which could seem scary and could make us want to avoid that…but what the enemy meant as harm, ‘God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.’ (Genesis 50:20)

This life is NOT our own. If we can step out of the natural and ask God to consistently reveal ‘the unseen’ spirit realm, things take on a whole new perspective. I know that I press into God whole-heartedly and have stepped up into leadership roles, so when the stupid crazy stuff in life happens, yeah it can be frustrating in the natural but if my eyes are fixed on the unseen, it’s really no big deal. I can give it to God and say ‘handle it.’

God has given us a huge UN-defeatable weapon in His word. THAT is why reading scripture is so important. It’s not because ‘reading the Bible is what a good Christian should do’…it’s because it’s our sword. If we were watching a battle on tv and saw an army getting slaughtered while their weapons were sitting right there next to them we’d think that was ridiculous right? Yet how often do we put ourselves in the exact. same. position. all the time.

We allow ourselves to get beaten up when the entire time powerful weapons are sitting there for us to use. We can claim with authority that no weapon formed against us shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17). That at the name of Jesus every knee will bow (Philippians 2:10)…the list goes on. There is a specific weapon to fight our every need and circumstance.

Leadership is not for fame or recognition. Leadership can really mess up what we think life should look like. But it’s not our life to begin with. When we say ‘Here am I send me, Lord’, we’re handing every single little detail over to Him to be used for HIS GLORY. None of this stuff on earth matters. Our relationship with Him is a constant journey of laying ourselves down, laying our expectations down and opening ourselves up to the unseen while He teaches us to be HIS WARRIORS. This life is going to be a fight. It can get rough. But His glory revealed in us far surpasses any glory we could ever experience in the natural. And THAT is what makes it worth it.

When we align our thinking with the unseen, and allow God to reveal more of it to us, suddenly our circumstances and the things that have given us the greatest struggle don’t really matter anymore. I’m a 33 year old girl who still doesn’t have a ‘thriving successful career’ or a growing family or a perfectly decorated house or ______ like what ‘the world’ says I should have. Frustrating and discouraging in the natural? Yes. But from the unseen perspective? It’s exactly where I’m supposed to be. My journey has gotten me to this point where I have been able to encourage others in their own ‘is God EVER going to show up’ journeys. There was PURPOSE in my journey just as there is purpose in yours.

God is Alpha and Omega…the beginning and end…all at the same time. He knows where we need to be now, to learn what we need to pick up from this season in order to be ready and to thrive in the next season. There is PURPOSE.

We need to be constantly praying for God to show us His purpose and to show us how to fight. Because there is a battle. And we can either be ripped to shreds or we can stand victorious and revel in the beauty of His victory. Because we know the ending to this story…we win. (even if it doesn’t look like ‘winning’ in the natural 😉 )

Image Credit: Erin Kass Photography

Today is the first day where I’m sitting down to write without having a clear direction in my head. For Days 1-6, I’ve had a topic and possible directions for content but today, not so much. But isn’t that just like life. Some days we know exactly where we’re going and other days we’re either waiting for direction or we’re stepping out in blind faith.

Within the past couple of weeks, while praying for direction in a couple areas of life, God showed me that life is a chess game and He is the master player. I don’t know much about chess (other than the fact hubby and I played it on our first kinda-date…and I won 😉 ) but I know it’s strategic. Pieces can move backwards and forwards all over the board based on the ‘abilities’ of the different types of pieces. I also know looking at a chess board can be really confusing. At least with checkers you know pieces move in one direction and the rules are relatively straight forward. Oh, how much easier would life be if it were more like checkers, right?

What God revealed to me in this analogy was that just like chess pieces occupy their squares on the board game, we’re supposed to occupy our squares on the board of life. Our responsibility in this moment is to bring as much God-life into our current square. Neighbors, co-workers, people on the street we come in contact with, etc.

Also, considering this analogy, you don’t see chess pieces freaking out because they’re in a certain square. Obviously chess pieces aren’t alive (unless you live in my brain cause I can personify any inanimate object…you can’t leave the last cookie in the box or it’ll get lonely and sad…all those ‘Night at the Museum’ and ‘Toy Story’ movies where things come to life would’ve totally come from my thoughts) but for the purpose of this illustration, let’s imagine they are.  A piece is hanging out in its square when its suddenly picked up and moved to the next one. Easy peasy. The chess piece’s purpose is to simply trust the chess player and go wherever he/she leads. They stay in that next square until it’s time to be moved again.

So in the chess game of life…I’m hanging out in my square. I have questions for direction for the future, I may not have a clue where I’m going, I may not have a clue what life outside of my square even looks like…but I’m supposed to hang out here and own my square until God shows me otherwise. In the meantime I will make this square look the best it can possibly look. I will invite the presence of God into my square so that the next person who inhabits it feels His presence. I won’t worry about my next square or even what the rest of the game looks like…I’ll live in the joy of where I’ve been placed for this moment.

In searching for the answers and directions for my life, God didn’t reveal the overall picture at once. He led me through the squares. He showed me the next step to take, I took it and then waited for Him to reveal the next step. It was a much more peaceful wisdom-seeking process compared to previous times in my life where I’ve considered all angles, stressed about all possible directions, tried to figure out the answers on my own, etc etc etc…when I’ve tried to do the Master’s job instead of rest in my role as the game piece.

I’m so thankful that the Master can see the entire board at once and that His ways are so much higher than ours as it says in Isaiah 55:9. Lord, when I start acting crazy in my current square, remind me of your perspective and that all I have to do is enjoy the view from here and rest in your infinite wisdom.

Image Credit: Abby Vencil

 

Today is one of those days that would’ve meant no blog post if I were stuck in making it perfect. I had misc things going on that broke up my time (so I didn’t have a good solid block to sit and write) and then this evening my body was starting to feel not so happy. Hubby has had a cold thing the past few days and I refuse to say I’m coming down with it! 😀  But you’ve been warned…I’m not sure I’m fully awake while I write this. You may need the gift of interpretation to figure out what I’m trying to say hee hee.

It’s amusing to me that God put today’s topic in my head earlier today and here I sit knowing that tomorrow is very much going to be a rest day as much as I can help it…because my body is likely going to demand it. Unfortunately way too often over my lifetime my body has been the one who has had to demand the rest. It’s gone on strike, said “sorry if you’re not gonna stop and give me what I need, then I’m going on vacation and interfering with your plans” With the way the past month has gone, I wouldn’t be surprised if my body is taking over!

I do not rest well by nature. My mind is usually active unless I intentionally shut it off or at least turn it down to a low hum. I’m always coming up with new ideas, ways to make life better, etc. I also don’t tend to do well with just sitting around. I struggle with feeling like I should be doing something. Especially if I’m staring at all the things I should be doing…like cleaning house. Sometimes it’s not even a ‘should’ but a ‘want to’ like when I get the urge to do something crafty with paper and other scrap booking supplies.

But several years ago, as I began the recovery process after getting to the point where my body was so worn down it could barely sit up, God showed me how resting is productive. Resting should be on our ‘to do list’. So often in this world of ‘busy’ being a badge of honor, having to keep up with the Joneses, get more, do more, always stop moving, we feel like resting is a waste of time. Setting aside a Saturday to rest and saying ‘sorry that day isn’t free’ when someone asks if you can get together just feels rude. But what is this busy-ness costing us? Are we really able to fully enjoy life when we’re just focused on going from one thing to the other and trying to survive through the day until you can attempt to go to sleep at night, just to stay up too late working on something or trying to solve life’s problems…which means not getting enough sleep that night just to wake up the next morning to start all over? I know that’s a long run on sentence, but how often and easily can life feel like one long run-on sentence?

Our language has periods and reasons to pause, shouldn’t our lives have them too?

Instead of living in the world’s economy of busy-ness and exhaustion, I’d rather live in God’s economy of rest, peace and strength. I’d rather set boundaries and know what my God-given priorities are so I can make decisions for how to spend my time & energy accordingly. Instead of getting up every day with MY to do list and ways to go about it, I’d rather get up every day and ask God for His wisdom and direction.  As the saying goes, some say they don’t have time to spend restful quiet time with God…but reality is that we really don’t have the time NOT to!

Image credit: Erin Kass Photography

With all the random and diverse thoughts that pass through my head on a daily basis, these success-based thoughts are what God has shown me to write about these past few days. When I started this 5 days ago, I really wasn’t expecting it to go this direction but hey, that’s the fun of it right? It’s an organic thing that is developing along the way…So I guess if you’re reading this and have really needed to hear these words about this topic, consider it God’s personal gift to you 😉

Fear is a nasty bug. It could easily be compared to a spider and it’s web. I actually happen to love watching spiders weave webs and am in awe of the spider web design itself, however do I want the creepy crawly legs walking on any part of my body? Absolutely not. Especially since I grew up in a FL orange grove and have experienced the larger-than-human-hand size grove spiders greeting me in my bedroom before I intended to go to sleep. Intended to being the key phrase here, because there was absolutely no way I was closing my eyes with one of those things lurking…*shiver*. Ok enough with the heebie geebies…

Fear weaves its web and waits for us to get an idea to step out of our comfort zones. To step out in faith, in a direction we feel God is leading us toward, in an attempt to fully live and enjoy the abundant life He created us for. But if you’ve ever watched a spider capture an unfortunate bug who happened to touch its web, you know it takes a fraction of a second for mr. spidey friend to secure its next meal. It only takes a fraction of a second for the ‘fear spider’ to devour our faith thoughts.

There are many areas where fear can mess up our heads, but fear of failure has been one of my biggest spiders. In my head, there’s no reason to fail if we have the ability to calculate all the possible outcomes and create back up plans and how to handle them to prevent failure. But reality is, that takes forever AND there is absolutely no way we can predict every single possible unknown. And by us WORRYING and creating anxiety in our bodies through concentrating on every possible thing that could go wrong, we’re not living in faith and trusting the one who is Alpha and Omega, the beginning and end, the one who already knows where we’re headed…and knows it’ll be ok because He’s still on the throne and He holds the universe in His hand 🙂

I have wasted countless hours in my lifetime, worrying about missing God’s direction for my life. Being afraid to take a step in any direction because what if it was the wrong one??? What if I took a step down the wrong path? What if I did something and ‘failed’?

And then God showed me that He is big enough. If my heart is set on earnestly following Him, and in my humanness I screw up and make a wrong decision or get involved with something I maybe shouldn’t have, He is big enough. Even if my heart hasn’t been fully set on Him and I’ve decided to take over my life and leave Him on the sidelines, He is big enough.

When a baby is first learning to walk, they go all over the place right? They wobble, they fall, they get back up, go to the right, then decide to go to the left, etc. But no one freaks out and gets upset because they’re falling or weaving back and forth do they?  No, their parents are cheering them on because they’ve made the effort to stand up and take their first steps. They’ve fallen and gotten back up again.

If this is how earthly parents see their earthly children, how much MORE is our Heavenly Father cheering for us?!?!? So what if we step out in faith and royally screw up?! We decide it’s a success because we can learn valuable information to carry into our future. Instead of getting caught up in the web of fear, we can rise above and allow faith to give us the ability to use the web strands as pathways to freedom in God instead of sticky traps that keep us contained.

Image Credit: Erin Kass Photography

I’ve mentioned how quickly this blog came about over the past few days, however it is the visible result of the activity that has happened beneath the surface for years. We often hear the term ‘overnight success’. Yesterday we didn’t know so-and-so even existed, yet today the person is known by millions thanks to a popular YouTube video or viral FB post. In line with yesterday’s post about defining success (read it here if you missed it)…often what is considered success is what is seen. It’s the tangible and the measurable. We like to group things into categories and try to make sense of life in our heads so it’s easiest to measure the concrete.

I like to get insight into God’s kingdom through nature – His creation. For the most part what happens in nature is the result of what He set in motion when He created the heavens and the earth…so since it’s a reflection of how He does things, I often find ways to apply the principles to my every day existence.

I consider this blog as the equivalent of a new plant breaking through the surface of the soil. (agh, if I were editing, I would totally rephrase that sentence but I’m not so moving on…see, I’m making progress on this 31 day  journey 😉 )  God planted this blog seed in me a while ago…only He knows exactly when. He started working in me to open up and ‘be real’ and take off the perfectly pretty mask that covered up the ‘messy’ back in the summer of 1999 at a church youth camp. I can vividly remember standing in the middle of a circle, with the eyes of my fellow youth group members staring, saying how I was ready to take off the mask. That I was ready to ‘be real’ and allow God to use me openly even if it meant that my junk was hanging out.

‘Fast forward’ to now, 15 years later and I’ve started a public blog that’s created a platform for me to share my messy junk with whoever happens to land on www.readytobreathe.com. Yes I just laughed in my head as I wrote ‘fast forward’. Because obviously there was no fast forward. It has been a process. A process involving a TON of molding and shaping and getting me to the end of myself and coaxing me to step closer to the ledge and getting me to step out of the box of fear that had been tightly latched, keeping me stuck for the majority of my life. It has been WORK. Just like it’s work for the farmers who plant their crops every season.

This year especially, God has shown me how this life is ‘not about me’. I have lost track of how many times I’ve repeated that phrase in my head. When I’ve felt the feelings of disappointment or frustration or whatever else that has been opposite of the direction God has shown me to follow, He’s reminded me that it’s not about me. I can throw the junk in His capable and willing hands and keep pressing on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me as Paul wrote in Philippians 3:14.

He’s been preparing the soil of my heart, feeding it, pulling weeds, pouring His living water, and nurturing the seed that was His all along. As I’ve followed Him in the ‘daily’, it has grown and taken root and as soon as I saw the info about this 31 day challenge, I knew this seed of writing was ready to break through the surface and become visible. That’s the funny thing. If you’ve ever planted a seed, you cover it up with dirt and then just wait to see if it will break through the surface one day. I know there have been some literal seeds I’ve planted that I wasn’t sure if they would show up…but then sure enough, there they were. Just not in my timing or within my expectations.

So much like God. He’s illustrated the principle of His timing over and over yet we still freak out and run around acting crazy and stressed wondering if the dang seed is EVVVEEEERRRR going to break through the soil and reveal itself to the world. And somehow we also go crazy wondering what the seed package looked like so we can know exactly what the seed is supposed to grow into. But peace and joy and rest and all of the other things that come with the presence of God flood our lives when we sit back and let the Master farmer tend to His crop. Our responsibility is simply to quiet the noise, hand it over to Him and listen for His direction.

Image credit: Erin Kass Photography

 

Today I was asked a question that usually makes me cringe: “How’s the business?”

The photography business. The business that has essentially been 13 years in the making..since I graduated with my degree in Photographic Technology in 2001. Except for the 5ish years that I stopped pursuing it because I was sick of the ‘business’ part of it and got married, moved to VA and pursued other things instead. So I guess more like the past 7-8 years since photography starting creeping back into my life again.

When someone asks me this question, it usually makes me cringe because I am no where near the mental picture I’ve had for where I hoped to be by now. I’m no where near what ‘people’ would consider successful. But today I said “Great”! You know why? Because I’ve decided that I’m defining what success means from now on.

Because I have chosen to put my marriage as a higher priority and have invested energy into making sure it is healthy when I could’ve been investing the energy in my work instead. And hubby and I celebrated our ten year anniversary this past January and we’re in the best place we’ve ever been.

Because 7 years ago I was so sick that I couldn’t even sit up well and wasn’t sure if I would ever have a ‘normal’ life again. But here I am, living my life and am in the best place I’ve ever been. (I’m not sure it would be considered ‘normal’, but I’m at least much farther than struggling to sit up ;)…and besides what is normal anyway?!?! )

Because I’ve said ‘Here am I. Send Me!’ and have allowed God to mess up my plans. In life and on a daily basis. I’ve chosen to invest in people because God has placed them in my path, even when it’s meant an interruption to my day.

Because this life is not about me. I’m here to be used by God. Period.

I’m here to be His mouthpiece to speak life and encouragement into the lifeless and discouraged. I’m here to be His provision in the form of a fresh hot ham, egg & cheese bagel when there’s a homeless man who probably hasn’t eaten much in days, digging in the trash looking for food.  (which my amazing husband actually did recently…I seriously love his heart for people). I’m here to be His place of refuge as I open up my far-less-than-perfect, Pinterest-would-fall-over-and-die-if-it-were-alive-and-saw-it house so that people can come stay and feel welcomed, loved and taken care of and hopefully leave in a better place than when they arrived.

THAT is what I want to consider successful from this point forward. That I am living my life in a way that glorifies and worships my Heavenly Father. Not if I have a certain number of people who know who I am, or appointments on my calendar, or money in my bank account. Because what will all of that matter in eternity if I haven’t used it to make a difference.

Image Credit: Erin Kass Photography

Here I am on Day Two. Yesterday I was excited. My head was still spinning from the quick, God-warp-speed progression of how this site/blog came to be. In less than a week’s time, I saw the information about this 31 day challenge, had the idea for my topic less than 5 minutes later, God downloaded a whole new vision for this blog including a ‘mission’ verse, possible topics to write about and an overall huge potential direction, I secured the new domain this past weekend then loaded Word Press on the site and selected a simple theme yesterday before writing my first post. I don’t think I’ve done anything to this magnitude that quickly. Usually I would need to consider every detail from all angles…would need to assess if I really have enough time to devote to this, would I have enough to write about, how should the layout/theme be put together, oh and if it’s a new thing that means I need a new logo and full branded pretty package…because details matter in marketing and people won’t read stuff blah blah blah blah blah. Yes there is value in all of the marketing/branding ‘stuff’, but it often becomes a road block for me because…you guessed it, I feel the need to do it perfectly. (I am a photographer for those of you who don’t already know me…and have been on the branding & biz set-up journey for the past couple of years. That’s right…couple of years…perfection takes time HAH)

I posted yesterday still in the roller coaster ‘high’. I personally am not a fan of roller coasters so I haven’t been on many. But I can relate to the feeling as soon as you get off of one (and again, my idea of roller coasters may be others’ idea of ‘kiddie ride’ but still…). The ride stops and you’re thinking ‘THAT WAS AWESOME’! The entire ride you may have been thinking ‘WHAT THE HECK, GET ME OFF OF THIS THING, I’M GONNA DIE’,  but at least for me, right at the end there is a feeling of euphoria (or maybe it’s relief) and for a split second you think ‘Let’s do that again!!!’ Until the reality sets in that it was pure torture until it was over…

I was in the euphoric haze until late last night as the realization of reality started sinking in. I realized I had just committed to writing every.single.day. for the rest of this month. 31 whole days. In a row. Of essentially being ‘naked’. No editing, just being my real self. Which was fine until I realized that there were now people who said they wanted to follow this journey of mine. Meaning I’m going to be NAKED IN PUBLIC. Awesome.

Strangely enough, the idea of sharing actual naked content wasn’t what launched the perfectionist action sequence in my brain. It was the fact that I’ve committed to writing this without…making it perfect. I joined the FB group to connect with other 31 day writers and saw planning lists and that others were redesigning their blogs and and and…doing all the things that I would typically do. For a few minutes I started considering that I should be doing the same. But then I remembered my purpose for all of this. My purpose is not to please and impress an audience of many. It’s to glorify an audience of One.

One of my amazing talented friends who has the voice of an angel (hi AnnMarie 🙂 )  sings on her church’s praise team down in FL. They often have worship nights that are ‘Concerts for the audience of One’. I love that. Isn’t that what our lives are supposed to be? Worship concerts for the audience of One?

God has gifted me with this perfectionistic characteristic and there is purpose for it. But like every other character trait that we all have, He’s gifted us with these talents in order to glorify Him. In order to realize that in our own abilities they won’t get us very far…but when we allow Him to use them through us, that’s where the magic happens. A football in my hands is pretty worthless…however in the hand of a gifted quarterback, it’s Super Bowl trophy worthy.

Maybe I don’t need to ‘recover’ from being a perfectionist. Maybe I just need to hand it over to God and allow Him to use it.

Image Credit: Erin Kass Photography

 

 

Hi. My name is Erin and I am a recovering idealist perfectionist. I see the potential in the world around me and would be happier than a little kid eating candy at Disney World if reality always lined up perfectly with what’s in my head. But obviously that doesn’t happen. Life usually doesn’t come anywhere close. Because life is life. And truth be told, life really wouldn’t be as much fun if it weren’t for the dips and turns and unknowns to keep us on our toes and always hanging onto God to lead us into the next thing. (at least that’s what I try to tell myself…in my current 12,165 step process toward recovery…the number of days I’ve been alive…plus a few more to account for leap years and the fact that I only counted from my birthday this year until Sept 25 since that was easiest [as my birthday is May 25] and it’s now Oct 1…confession: it is actually taking work to keep myself from looking up how many leap years I’ve lived though in order to calculate the exact number…but that would defeat the purpose of this post)

I have heard several times that perfection is the enemy of progress and that is definitely true. But for me, God has recently revealed that perfection is the enemy of purpose. For my purpose is to be me. In all of my crazy weirdo creative glory. Me, the analytical, daydreaming, getting excited about squirrels & bunnies in the yard, deep feeler, passionate, complex, beautiful creation of God. Because my purpose is to be used by Him to give others freedom to be their purpose as I freely live out mine. Because all of our purposes is to be ourselves.

A few days ago, I came across a 31 Day writing challenge thanks to my beautiful friend Angie. 31Days is a challenge to pick one topic and write a post about that topic every day in October. I immediately knew I had to join. I can’t remember the last time I’ve done something consistently for 31 days in a row…or even longer than a week if I’m being perfectly honest. (ha, see, even my honesty has to be perfect) The reason? Every time I have committed to consistency, the desire to be perfect has taken over. Perfect takes too much time and energy to maintain. ‘Hey, I need to do ____ today because I committed to it…oh but I’m not in the right frame of mind, I have a headache, the paint chipping on the wall is distracting me, etc etc etc’

It’s time for me to break through perfect. To live this life fully breathing in the beauty that lives outside of perfect. To write without trying to make sure everything is grammatically correct, or that I didn’t leave out an ‘or’ or ‘and’…to freely think in my quirky incomplete sentence fragments and random bunny-chasing side notes. If you plan to follow me on this journey, you’ve been warned…English majors beware ;).

I can’t wait to see where this journey takes me… and hopefully by the end of this month, I’ll be able to write a post without having to take so many breaks because I get distracted by trying to analyze certain phrases or thinking too much about whether or not something makes sense 😉 HA!

In the modified words of Tigger, Ta ta til tomorrow!

Image Credit: Erin Kass Photography