Today’s post has been brewing for a couple days now. And it’s a post that I’m just going to have to spit out in the same way that you rip off a bandaid…quickly and without much consideration. Because while it’s exciting on the one side, it is sending my analytical side into overdrive…and if I think about it too much I will freaktheheckout (freak the heck out for those who aren’t used to chopping up hashtagged/run-together words 😉 )
Yesterday I told someone about a friend of mine who is one of the most God-believing faith-filled people I know. And she always has been. We were in high school together and I still remember her saying how God would provide ______ or _____ if we just believe Him. Her head was in the unseen. You knew if God was gonna show up for anyone, He was gonna show up for her.
Almost immediately after that convo ended, I thought ‘wow, I bet people wouldn’t say the same about me. Yikes.’ Ok, maybe someone would say that my faith is high…it is my primary spiritual gift. I believe God can show up in ways that are beyond our comprehension. I’ve seen Him do it.
But I’m talking about the HUGE, no doubt, no over-analyzed, God-sized-life faith. The faith that comes with all the songs about God bringing us into the depths of the ocean ‘where my trust is without borders’ (Hillsong ‘Oceans’) and getting caught up in His waves of love. Waves of love, happy closeness with God, a life overflowing with Him…that all sounds lovely and can give us the feels when we sing it. But do we rrrrreallly know what we’re singing when we sing those songs???
It probably could be illustrated by Peter when he was walking on the water: (Peter, as he’s stepping out of the boat, starting to walk toward Jesus…in a happy sing song lovey voice “Jesus lead me out into the deep, let me walk upon the waters, etc etc etc” (he realizes he’s actually WALKING. ON. WATER.) “Hey, look at me, I’m walking on water, pretty cool…HOLY CRAP, WHAT AM I DOING, WATER ISN’T SOLID, YOU CAN’T WALK ON IT, AM I CRAZY?!?! WHAT THE HECK WAS JESUS THINKING WHEN HE ASKED ME TO STEP OUT OF THE BOAT…UH OH, I REALIZE I’M NOT ABOVE THE WATER ANYMORE glub glub” (this scenario is probably much more amusing in my head and I’m so sorry I can’t actually verbalize it for you, but hopefully you get the gist 😉 )
This weekend I’ve realized that while my faith gaze has been set toward the open waters of endless God-possibilities, somewhere in the back of my head I’ve known that the shore is still visible somewhere behind me. But God wants me to have ‘in the middle of the ocean, no shore in sight, I have absolutely no option but to trust in Him and allow Him to knock my socks off’ faith. The faith that doesn’t just say ‘I’m trusting and believing God to provide $200 for this mission trip He’s called me to’ (because $200 is a reachable number in my head) but instead to believe for $20,000 to provide a new home for orphans in Africa.
I’m not saying we’re all supposed to build $20,000 homes for orphans in Africa…I know that’s not what He has for me either. But God has put the equivalent sized dream in me and He’s just waiting for me to say ‘ok God, this is yours, let’s do this.’ And He’s ready for me to go ALL IN. Not to say ‘I have faith in God’, while calculating how it could be accomplished or stressing over details or if it will even happen, but to TRULY have unshakeable faith…where there is His supernatural peace that comes with the knowledge that He has it all under control.
My God parted seas, brought the dead back to life, and wiped out entire armies when the odds were not in ‘His’ favor. Over and over and over again He’s proven His faithfulness…and since He is ‘the same yesterday and today and forever’ (Hebrews 13:8b), the same God who did all of those things and so much more is the same God who is going to show up in my life as I put my faith in Him and follow where He leads.
Image Credit: Erin Kass Photography